Change . . .

is hard at first, messy in the middle and gorgeous at the end.  Robin Sharma

 

"Strength!  Courage!       Don't be timid; don't get discouraged. God, your God, is with you every step you take." Joshua 1:9

 

My life has certainly seen it’s fair amount of changes ~ sometimes I think more than its fair share.  As a little girl, I remember wanting to just stay put.  Being the daughter of an army officer lent itself to many moves ~ try three different schools in second grade in two different countries.  The truth is although I was shy and feared the thought of not making new friends in new places, I always felt safe because my parents were my constant.

Beginning five years ago my life underwent enormous change; the demise of a 23-year marriage, a whirlwind courtship, re-marriage, a move to another state, becoming a step-mom and my daughters leaving the nest.  Unplanned circumstances in a life that likes to plan and organize to the smallest detail.  In the midst of all the external changes; the heartbreak and grief of letting go of a long-fought battle, the questions asked through floods of tears at why my prayers were answered so differently than I had envisioned, the wonderment at being given the gift of true love and feeling like everything in life is a dream from which I could awake at any moment.  To say that life felt surreal is an understatement.

Fast forward to the present; leaving behind sons I have grown to love, leaving a job I enjoyed immensely, saying goodbye to new friends made and leaving a home I cherished.  I was painting rooms, painting cabinets and replacing carpet in my home for someone else.  I was purging and packing with the knowledge that many of these things would go in storage for the undetermined future and I wouldn’t see them for a while.  I seemed to suffer a temporary packing paralysis.  Thank God for my husband or it may not have gotten done.

The unknown and what the future holds has never been the worry for me.  My struggle with change has been letting go of what I’ve had in the past and at this present moment.  Loss of friendships, loss of my work identity, loss of my little corner of the world.  But what God has taught me is that these are not losses, these are seasons through which we pass to grow into the next.  Some things turn out exactly as planned, some things go terribly wrong, most of the time we end up not where we expected but someplace much better.

Sometimes change happens because we make a decision and follow through.  Sometimes change happens to us due to external forces over which we have no control and we have to navigate the ride.  Whatever the reasons or however scary, change can invigorate, revitalize and transform us if we let it.

Of one thing I am certain.  Certain with every fiber of my being because my life has been a collection of countless examples of this truth ~ I am certain of God’s love, certain of His faithfulness, certain that no matter what the trials and tribulations, God has my back, certain that although He may not answer prayers in the way I am expecting, He will answer them in ways I could never fathom.  He has been, is now, and always will be my constant.

Do you have a story of change that might encourage another?

Amazing Grace . . .

That saved a wretch like me.

For many years, I had the wonderful privilege of playing Mary, the mother of Jesus in my church's production of the Easter Story.  The production depicted the story from the time Jesus entered Jerusalem, the last supper, the Garden of Gethsemane, the arrest, trial, beating, crucifixion and finally the resurrection.  I did not speak ~ not a word.  I looked on and cried ~ a lot.

I often received compliments for how well I acted out the depth of emotion.  Every year my response was the same ~ thank you.  But inside I was thinking it wasn't because I'm a good actress, those were real tears, real gut wrenching sobs ~ just undeniably raw, intense and grateful gut wrenching sobs.

I lost count so I don't remember how many years I played the part, but each year I spent about a few weeks always on the edge of spilling tears.  See, it wasn't just the performances, but re-enacting and living the intense emotion through rehearsals as well.  I am not complaining, because all those tears as hot as they felt running down my face, were cleansing and healing beyond imagining.

I wasn't just crying because I empathized with Mary.  Of course I imagined the pain she must have felt watching her Son be put to death in such a horrific manner and yet knowing that just as her womb was chosen by God to be the vessel for the Christ-child, that her Son was fulfilling the promise of all time.  I was also crying in amazement at the incredible sacrifice of the Lamb of God.  He did this for me, for you, for all humankind and for one reason ~ because He loves us so much and He wants to be with us forever.
 
When I looked on as He was being beaten, nailed to and then hung on the cross, I looked on as a mother.  But the moment I touched Him and crumpled at the foot of the cross, the gut wrenching sobs came because I was crying for me . . . for the times when I was dishonest, selfish, mean, jealous, lied, manipulative . . . well the list could go on.  For every good thing I am or have done, there are so many things I have said and done that leave me in abject shame.  In that moment, I was struck with the depravity that exists in humankind ~ which includes me.  And yet, God so graciously and lovingly suffered for me, for my sins, for all our sins, so that we can live forever and know a love beyond compare and the tears flowed ~ tears of pain, tears of sorrow, tears of apology ~ but mostly tears of gratefulness for the beautiful gift of amazing grace.

Hot flashes ~ be gone with you . . .

and my MacaPause miracle!

First of all, I feel the need to post a disclaimer that I am not a medical health professional.  I am a woman who likes living a healthy, fit life.  I want to be active well into old age ~ not just surviving, but thriving.  I do a lot of reading and ask a lot of questions in my pursuit of healthy living.

Perimenopause is defined as the time period in which a woman's body transitions to complete infertility.  I'm in that stage.  According to my doctor, I will be in menopause once I have not had a menstrual cycle for 12 months.  For the last three years, my body plays an awful trick on me by not producing a flow until I hit the 10 or 11 month mark.  Are you kidding me?  So close!

So I am not going into all the details of this stage of life.  Anything you want to know, you can ask your doctor or google.

What I can share is that I NO LONGER HAVE HOT FLASHES AND NIGHT SWEATS!  About two weeks prior to my move back to Washington State, I was in my local health food store and picked up literature about Femmenessence MacaPause  https://www.femmenessence.com/index.php/femmenessence-macapause.html.

I had been experiencing hot flashes and night sweats on and off for about 1 1/2 years.  The night sweats would wake me up two to three times per night.  I would awaken just prior to the combustion of heat ramping up, tear off the covers, cool down, cover up, fall asleep, repeat.  And trust me when I say this isn't just a matter of getting warm and cooling off with a fan.  Hot flashes are some kind of internal inferno that wouldn't be relieved from living inside a freezing meat locker!  The heat goes down when it wants to go down.

My doctor asked me if I would like a prescription to provide relief.  Because of all the potential side effects of typical treatments for this natural stage of life and also because I have not experienced the many other symptoms associated with menopause, I declined.  However, I really desired an uninterrupted night of sleep.  So my research began and then I serendipitously stumbled upon the literature for Femmenessence MacaPause.  Maca Root is the supplement that is the basis for this product.  I went online, read a lot, compared the different brands that produce this supplement and decided to give it a try.

The product package states that you'll feel relief within 2 to 21 days.  It took about 7 days for me to be completely free of hot flashes.  Because the hot flashes may have gone due to natural hormone cycles, I was going to test it by not taking it for a while.  However, due to some very busy family fun times and not having brought the MacaPause with me, I missed a few doses and lo and behold the furnace got stoked up in all it's menacing fury.  I immediately set an alarm on my phone to remind me to take it and I carry some in my purse at all times.  After a couple of doses, I was feeling relief again.  Yay!!!!

So bottom line ~ I highly recommend Femmenessence MacaPause https://www.femmenessence.com/index.php/femmenessence-macapause.html.  You may find relief with another Maca Root product and that is fine, just get relief.  I happen to like all the research this company has done and that it can claim clinical proof of it efficacy.  They also have other products in their line that serve women of all ages.  I am certainly a fan!

Please let me know if you try this product or something like it and if it works for you.  We can most definitely help one another by sharing.  Thanks!